I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
this will be a night to untag.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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