I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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