omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Randomize