also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
