I have demons in me.
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
