after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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