Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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