If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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