brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize