The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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