I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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