After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
