its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize