I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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