I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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