There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
