Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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