But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Why is your signature on my underwear?
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize