Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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