No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Randomize
