I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
