jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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