It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Randomize
