Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
