I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
