just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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