I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Randomize
