Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize
