So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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