Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
