I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Randomize
