Betty ford says i'm here all night
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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