Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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