don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
