Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
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