do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Randomize
