I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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