if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
