Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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