is wine microwaveable?
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
