craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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