Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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