a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
