yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
