Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
