he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize