I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
