Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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