My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize