I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
