the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
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