Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
