I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Randomize